Cosmetics

Reviewing: SHU UEMURA PHYTO BLACK LIFT RADIANCE BOOSTING LOTION
Approx. $45 U.S., purchased at Holt Renfrew, also available at Sephora.com

This received fairly decent reviews, so I decided to give it a try. It's one of those Japanese moisturizing lotions that has the consistency of a toner. The Phyto Black ingredients are black tea and black sugar, while the lotion's AHA Fruit Complex Extract is designed to stimulate cell turnover; hence, the "radiance" that comes with using it.

Like all of Shu Uemura's products, the packaging is sleek and minimalist: it looks like the kind of thing a model would have in her carry-on luggage. It doesn't really have a scent, and it does exactly what it's supposed to: it lightly moisturizes and smooths the skin. HOWEVER, I have insanely sensitive combination skin and, of course, it reacted to the product. I started to develop enlarged pores that were clogged with hardened little bits. It could be that the hot weather is encouraging this reaction, but it is a fairly upsetting side-effect because the enlarged pores never disappear. Such irony: it makes my skin smooth and beautiful while at the same time creatng some of the most unsightly blemishes I've ever had.

I went back and asked the girl at the counter if there was anything I could do. She suggested that I needed to cleanse my face before using the lotion (I stopped cleaning my face when I realized that my face broke out from several of the soaps I was using). She gave me samples of face oil -- something I'm quite afraid of, because Softymo's and Kose's both made me break out -- and I gave it a try. I then used the boosting lotion. My pores started to enlarge again. Damn!

I'd recommend this product to anyone who doesn't have terribly sensitive skin. I'm a huge fan of Shu Uemura, and I'm sad to give this product away (especially at the price!), but such is the way of life.

Summer '09: Trends I'm Hating

Trends can be all fine and dandy if they show off a certain sense of individual style at the same time. However, with the appearance of Aritzia, our streets are now flooded with Wilfred and Talula knock-offs. It's like a more sophisticated, less tacky version of H&M (I hate H&M!!!), yet it's so prevalent that it ceases to have meaning.

Consider the picture to the left: the Aritzia blog claims that these 3 staff members wore these outfits on the same day, and it was completely unplanned. I think this vividly demonstrates how unimaginative these people are. I won't deny that they would look perfectly okay -- or even stylish -- if you saw the individual girl walking down another city street. However, once you realize that EVERYONE in Vancouver is wearing the same planned outfit, the same brands, the same style ... well, it gets damned annoying. It's like those girls who used to dress head-to-toe in American Apparel -- blech.

Consider this look: very cute on a random slim, pretty girl who loves that I'm-with-the-band look. Now, the only thing I see when a girl passes by in her ridiculous, overly planned version of this outfit is "Taylor Momsen trying too hard." God, I hate that girl; she's all of sixteen and she's the most desperate starlet I've seen in a while. She could start a club with Dakota Fanning. Jesus.

Hate List:

planned "I didn't try" outfits that include boyfriend-anything (blazers, plaid shirts, shorts, jeans, etc.)

short shorts that look more like underwear

fedoras and straw hats

gladiator sandals

new "worn" scarves wrapped around your necks (you know what I'm talking about, hipsters at the Astoria -- you usually wear them with bright jeans/leggings/pantyhose and some long, tight t-shirt)

Please, please, please, for the love of God -- move on.

NOTE: To the mother who brought the gaggle of stupid teenage girls to "Bruno" last week, I hope God smites you down, you horrible excuse for a human being. That your daughter was such a frickin' cow at the age of 14 and she and her friends dressed and acted like jackasses while you stood by, smiling blandly as they rudely abused me at the box office ... well, parents like you make me seriously consider enforced sterilization.

Thank you.

Shopping in Vancouver: Places and Things I Hate

I hate these places with a violent passion. When I think about them, I get so angry I could kick over a well-organized pyramid of cans with my Brodie biker boots. But I don't, because I'm better than The Cult. On the upside, I watched "The Proposal" today and found the whole thing kinda entertaining.


Moving on, I HATE:

Shopping on Main Street

I particularly hate Tiger Tiger and Eugene Choo

Portobello West, which is a joke. It's enough to make your eyes bleed. If you like ugly, unoriginal folkart masquerading as charming, supposedly unique fashion statements, this place is for you. If you have anything resembling good taste then stay far, far away.

Dream Apparel (they've gone downhill and will represent just about anybody).

The Trout Lake Farmer's Market. It's just overpriced.

Silvercity employees. Damn slackers.

Metropolis/Metrotown. It is one of the most depressing places I have ever been. Plus, I am filled with an incredible sense of rage when I see all of those whorish teenage girls.

Coach and Louis Vuitton. A sign of bad taste.

Robson Street. Mindless crowds of tourists and Surrey-ites stumbling blindly all over the sidewalk. Shudder.

Holt Renfrew. Sadly, their hiring standards dropped dramatically when they expanded the space. To the guy I spoke to in the shoe department: if you don't understand the difference between a black, patent leather peep-toe mary jane and a purple, suede, lace-up sandle, then maybe you shouldn't be working there.

Wet, salmon-coloured nightmares

I am going to Salmon House on the Hill next weekend.

I'm feeling slightly worried. A little sick to my stomach. My last experience there was less than amazing, and I sort of remember getting a feeling of queasiness after eating their house pate. That was years ago.

However.

I just read the reviews online and they more or less cemented my fears. The consensus? Lazy cooking, unimaginative dishes and ingredients that aren't fresh. This is a sin in Vancouver, a place where fresh seafood is always at your fingertips. Maybe the fish delivery truck had a difficult time making it up that hill?

I think that most people who walk into a restaurant with some sort of prejudice get exactly what they're expecting. Lucky for me, my preconceived ideas don't often taint my final judgment. It's just that ... well, I'm never wrong in these scenarios. It's true. But, you never know -- maybe this will be the first time? I hope it is, because I'm having dinner with my pseudo-boyfriend's parents (who are visiting from England) and I'll have to choke the food down and feign happiness if it's half as crappy as everyone claims. Yeesh.

Wish me luck!